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I LOOK INTO A MIRROR AND WHAT DO I SEE? I SEE CONFUSING SADNESS IN THOSE EYES...A GURL WHOS CHANGED SO MUCH IN THE PAST YEAR... SHES PLEASED ABOUT THE CHANGE...BUT NOW SHE NOTICED THAT SHE IS NO LONGER A CHILD...A LITTLE GIRL WHO USED TO NOT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT ANYTHING...NOW SHES NOT SURE WHAT SHE IS...SHE KNOS FOR SURE SHE ISNT A CHILD BUT DOESN'T KNO IF SHE IS CONSIDERED TO BE A WOMAN...HER HAIR HAS SHRUNKED DARKENED HER NAILS ARE BLACK...HER WOMAN FEATURES ARE MORE NOTICABLE...HER EYELINER IS SMEARED ON HER CHEEKS FROM HER NATURE RAIN...YOU CAN SEE THE PAIN BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHATS WRONG WITH HER...YOU SEE HER SMILING AND LAUGHING AND FAKING A HAPPY LIFE WHEN YOU KNOW DEEP INSIDE SHE IS HIDING SUMTHING...SHE CLAIMED TO BE IN LOVE...BUT KNO ONE UNDERSTANDS HER...PEOPLE MAKE HER FEEL STUPID WHEN SHE SAYS THOSE WORDS ITS NOT EASY TO SAY HOW SHE FEELS TO THE PERSON WHO OPENED HER HEART AGAIN...SHES SHY IN THAT CASE...SHED RATHER SIT DOWN AND TYPE HER FEARS, PLANS, PROBLEMS, AND FEELINGS BEHIND A SCREEN...A SCREEN THAT CANT TELL HER TO SHUT UP OR FUCK OFF WITH THAT LAME SHIT...THAT SCREEN STAYS THERE WAITING FOR THE GURL TO OPEN UP TO IT... WHEN EVER THAT GURL ISNT TYPING OR THINKING SHE GOES TO HER BESTFRIEND HER DIARY...THAT DIARY HAS SEEN HER SMILE LAUGH CRY OR GET ANGRY AND CUSS OUT THE WHOLE DEMONS OUT...BUT IT NEVER TOLD HER NUFFIN IT STAYED AND LISTENED AND READ EVERYTHING SHE HAD TO SAY...THAT GURL IS MAD AT LIFE AT TIMES FOR BEING SO FUCKING DUMB... SHE THINKS ITS A FUCKING GAME THAT YOU NEED TO GO AGAINST OBSTACLES TO SURVIVE...BUT WHAT IF YOU WANNA LOSE THAT DAMN GAME WHAT IF YOU DONT WANNA CONTINUE TO THE NEXT LEVEL?THERES NO PAUSE IN THIS DAMN GAME SHE SAYS...THE GURL WIPES HER TEARS AND WHISPERS TO HERSELF..."THINGS WILL GET BETTER.. THINGS WILL TURN OUT GOOD FOR THE BOTH OF US BUT... WE HAVE TO TRY"

THAT GURL IS ME...AND I WILL TRY TO BE THE BEST AT EVERYTHING........